McSweeney's: Let There Be Lite.

"But in time She began to grow wroth. And when Man asked why She was wroth, She would say he ought to know, which only made Her more wroth.

But at last She gave Man a hint, in the form of a wise parable about some rural gentleman who would not invest in a cow because he was getting his dairy produce pro bono.

Man listened carefully to Her words, and pondered them.

Then Man said, 'Are you saying you're lactose intolerant?'

Boy, was She wroth."

Read the full tale at McSweeney's